Tuesday, March 15, 2005
a wonderful has finally ended. wonder if there will be another chance where i get to be with her and go out with her for almost the whole day, just like how we did in the past, the memorable past. finally can let out all my tears after trying so hard to hold it back for the whole day. think my smiles must have appeared to be so fake. wondered if she has noticed it. although i was 'sad', i was really very happy to be able to be going out with her today. really very happy. really enjoyed myself so much today. got to had lunch with her, watch movie, take neoprint, eat icecream and take the bus back with her to her house bus stop, sitting beside her all the way. never thought that i can get such a chance again. very thankful for this wonderful and probably last chance. although she still refused to answer the questions in the letter, i think my heart has already told me the answer. i have all the answers i need and i know where i stand. she must have never wanted to be in this relationship in the first place. somehow, she has made a mistake, got into it, realised her folly and now, has repented. i know this is totally the end for me and its over. there is no more chance like you said there may be. know you are trying not to hurt me further but its ok. i'm already hurt to a point where there is no cure. dont know what to or how to say either so i will stop here. the pain and feelings now is beyond words. thanks for the wonderful day today. hope you enjoyed yourself. i did very much. take care sweetheart.