Wednesday, May 25, 2005
exactly 1 year ago, i did not sms her the whole day and she was worried and when we met, i also did not tell her what happened while eating at the banquet foodcourt at parkway. then on the way home, she teared on the bus because she was worried when i did not sms her the whole day and i also did not want to tell her what happened. but now, just 2 hours ago, she said there is no need to sms her every morning as there she sees no need to, that she does not want to give in everytime. i just want to drop her a good morning message every morning, wishing her a nice day ahead that's all, not demanding her to reply as i know she prob wont. and now it's become that i'm demanding her to give in to me, to sms every morning. never knew i'm so 'demanding', expecting her to give in to me all the time. this is something new. haha. right from the start, when we first knew each other, to the times we were together to now, all i am is just demanding, asking her to give in to me everytime. what a nice thing to know, only after 1 and a half years. all we had was a demanding friendship, a demanding relationship for the past 1 and a half years. all the things that i did for her, wanting her to be happy is just demanding of her, asking her to give in to me, to call me, to sms me or to go out with me. well, she doesnt have to give in anymore. definitely not to me isnt it? who am i to her that she has to give in? very good friend like she said she wanted to be? doesnt seem like it. i'm just a nobody now. a nobody. someone whose existence doesnt even matter anymore.